How to Prepare Your Child for Their First ABA Session
Starting ABA therapy can feel overwhelming—for parents and children alike. First sessions set the tone for the entire therapeutic relationship. Proper preparation helps children feel safe, parents feel confident, and creates conditions for success. Here’s a comprehensive guide to preparing your child.
Before the First Session: What Parents Should Do
Understand What to Expect: Get clear information from the ABA provider about what will happen. Ask: Will my child be observed? How long will the session last? Will I be asked to implement strategies? What should I do if my child gets upset? Understanding the process reduces your anxiety, which children sense and respond to.
Prepare Your Child’s Environment: Designate a quiet space for the therapist to work with your child. This might be a corner of the living room, a bedroom, or dining table—somewhere with minimal distractions. Have materials available: paper, pencils, toys, snacks. Ask the provider what they prefer.
Prepare Motivators/Reinforcers: Identify what motivates your child. What are their favorite activities, foods, or items? The therapist will use these as reinforcers. Provide access to these so the therapist can use them to motivate learning. Without knowing what your child wants, the therapist can’t effectively reinforce behavior.
Brief Your Child Age-Appropriately: For younger children: “A new helper is coming to play with you and help you learn!” For older children: “A therapist is coming who can help you learn new skills. She’ll play games with you and we’ll try fun activities.” Keep it positive and matter-of-fact.
Plan Your Role: Clarify with the BCBA whether you should be present, in the background, or in another room. Some BCBAs prefer observing without parent interference. Others want you coaching alongside them. Understanding your role reduces uncertainty.
On the Day of the First Session
Maintain Normalcy: Keep your child’s routine as normal as possible. Don’t make the session seem like a big event or something to be nervous about. Casual mention and normal behavior help your child feel at ease.
Ensure Your Child Isn’t Hungry or Tired: A hungry, overtired child can’t focus. Schedule after naps when possible. Offer snacks if appropriate. A child in their best state is more likely to cooperate and engage.
Clear Space and Reduce Distractions: Minimize background noise, TV, siblings interrupting. Create an environment where your child can focus on the therapist and activities. A calm environment supports engagement.
Have Materials Ready: If the provider specified materials to have available, gather them. Toys, books, paper, pencils, preferred snacks. Organization shows you’re prepared and ready.
Manage Your Own Anxiety: Children are acutely sensitive to parental anxiety. If you’re nervous, your child will be too. Take a few deep breaths. Remind yourself this is a positive step toward helping your child. Your calm, positive demeanor sets the tone.
During the First Session
Let the Therapist Lead: The BCBA knows how to conduct an assessment and build rapport with children. Let them do their job. Your job is to stay available without hovering, answer questions when asked, and remain calm.
Observe and Notice: Pay attention to how the therapist interacts with your child. How do they respond to your child’s attempts? What activities capture your child’s interest? What makes your child smile? This observation helps you learn their approach.
Manage Siblings: If you have other children, arrange childcare for them during the session if possible. If not, ask siblings to play quietly in another room. A running background circus won’t let your child focus.
Don’t Coach or Correct: Let the therapist work. Even if you think your child “should” do something differently, resist the urge to coach or redirect. The therapist is learning your child’s style and abilities in this moment. Your input can be confusing.
If Your Child Gets Upset: This is normal. Some children get shy, anxious, or resistant initially. Quality therapists handle this professionally. They move slowly, offer choices, use positive reinforcement, and build rapport gradually. Trust the process. One rough first session doesn’t predict how things will go long-term.
After the First Session
Debrief with the BCBA: Ask what they observed. What are your child’s strengths? What challenges did they notice? What are initial thoughts on treatment direction? This conversation shapes your understanding and the treatment plan.
Answer Questions Thoroughly: The BCBA will likely ask about developmental history, medical background, behavior patterns, family priorities. Thorough answers help them understand your child and design appropriate treatment.
Praise Your Child: Let your child know they did great! “You were so brave! You worked really hard!” Positive feedback builds confidence about therapy.
Don’t Pressure Your Child for Details: Don’t repeatedly ask “What did you do?” or “Did you like the therapist?” Just let the session be what it was. Children sometimes don’t have great insight into what happened or why, and pressure can create anxiety.
Expect Some Adjustment: Your child may be excited or reserved. Some children take time to warm up to new people. That’s normal. Most children’s comfort increases over the first 2-3 sessions.
What to Expect as Sessions Continue
Initial sessions are typically assessment-focused. The BCBA observes your child, learns their style, identifies strengths and challenges, and gathers information. Formal teaching often begins in session 2-3 once the assessment is complete and initial rapport is built.
As you move forward, expect the therapist to become increasingly directive—teaching specific skills, using structured instruction, collecting data. The relationship deepens and your child often becomes more comfortable with the therapist over time.
The first few weeks often involve a “honeymoon period” where the novelty of a new person and activities is exciting. Then, as demands increase, some children initially resist. This is completely normal. Consistency and positive reinforcement help children push through this phase.
If Something Feels Off
Trust your gut. If the therapist doesn’t seem skilled, comfortable with your child, or aligned with your values, speak up. You can request a different therapist. The therapeutic relationship matters. A good fit supports success.
But also remember that initial awkwardness is often normal. Many great therapeutic relationships start somewhat stiffly and warm up over time. Give it 3-4 sessions before making major decisions unless something is genuinely concerning.
You’ve Got This
Preparation reduces anxiety for everyone. Your calm, organized approach helps your child feel safe and sets conditions for successful therapy. Contact us with questions about preparing for your child’s first session. We’re happy to answer any concerns and help you feel ready.